The Teenage Review-19

I turn 20 today! The date makes it even more special as today’s date is a palindrome, 7102017. This marks the end of my teenage years. 7 years ago if anyone would have told me I would be writing a blog and that too about the stuff that I write about, I wouldn’t have believed them. I tried to read some articles on the internet about what it is like to turn 20 and move towards a new stage in life and it seems that I haven’t had the most conventional teenage. I mostly came across people making irresponsible decisions, being carefree and all those things that any teenager is expected to be but I spent my whole teenage being as careful to not create much trouble as possible.

I read people talking about how they need to be responsible now and take things seriously but as someone who took things very seriously his whole adolescent life, I am tired of being responsible and serious now. I didn’t grow up responsibly to just spend the rest of my years taking everything as seriously as before. There should be a change. Of course, there are many things that have influenced what I am now but one thing I am sure about is that I am not going to be as serious as I used to be about everything.

If I had to sum up my teenage years in a few sentences it would go something like having ridiculous morals, being principled, being afraid of taking risks, staying in safe spaces, following all rules rigidly and so many more things that gave me this obsessive and compulsive personality. I would be obsessed with following rules and being morally right and that is something that I think had a major impact in spoiling my last two teenage years.

You know a lot about my last two years, how much I struggled, how it began and what it was like. I spent my 19th birthday at an airport. I was catching a flight from Bangalore to Delhi and although I had college that day, I was just so scared of anyone knowing that it was my birthday and the social anxiety that comes with it that I just left for the airport in the afternoon and spent the whole day there. This was a point where my problems were supposed to disappear but they weren’t. I didn’t have friends; I hardly trusted anyone and I didn’t even want to celebrate my birthday. I saw no point in doing so. I had convinced myself I was better off not celebrating it. I got home late night, cut a cake and all the customs that go with it but I didn’t enjoy one part of it. I remember how bad it was, actually I remember quite vividly down to some very particular details but hopefully that will disappear from my mind.

Since then from October, 2016, it was a downward graph for a long time, until around February, 2017. Things have gotten better since then. I have a blog and so much more now. So this year was really a mixed bag but with more positives than negatives. When you think about it, I am basically just going on multiple laps around the sun and I didn’t think I would make it this time but I did, and that is a mini achievement in itself. Now we go off on another lap around the sun.

I will try and review my teenage years in a new section now called, “The Teenage Review”. Tell me what you think I should add in it and any other suggestions you might have. Most importantly, don’t forget to wish me tonight!

7 Replies to “The Teenage Review-19”

  1. Aree ab toh naam reveal kar do! So I can wish you properly by taking your name!!!! You could connect with your blogging friends on FB if you are not comfortable to do it on a vast and open platform like twitter…
    I have been a sleepy head the whole day…Its been a lazy day! So couldn’t get your post earlier!
    First of all I would suggest…Start your Teenage review by revealing your name…. 😛
    Okay! Now that told…I can so relate to you on the b’day celebration part…My issue was quite opposite though…I was holding lot of expectations from ppl around me and badly wanted my life to be the same…But problem was many of them were married and priorities changed which made me feel they are going away from me! I couldn’t accept the change in their life. So naturally I wanted all that attention on my B’day….my friends wishing me at mid-night…cutting a cake and all that and when one yr that did not happened it broke me (Silly I know!), you do not know what triggers you until it does! So the next yr after that i came up with a stupid solution! I switched off my phone at mid-night and turned it on in the morning..My reason behind it was, I could manipulate myself saying “As my phone was off they couldn’t call!”. By doing this I was running away from my issues rather than facing them. But eventually that chain of insecurity broke and I am back to my normal happy life again. I am so thankful to my friend’s and family who stood by me!
    You have already started a new life with a strong will and determination of not giving up and already crossed many hurdles…I would suggest you to not run from problems and issues like me..for it will delay the process of attaining our happy-self..Rather face them like a “Knight of Steel” would!
    Okay! I guess bahut paka dia..not gng to bore you by making my comment even more lengthy!
    Happy B’day Dost.. 🙂

  2. Birthday is not the only day on which to wish. we can still wish you a happy birth month. so wish you the very best in life.ENJOY……………LIFE IS FULL OF HAPPINESS. TURN AROUND AND SEE THE LOVELY SIDE OF LIFE.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: