Humans are both emotional and rational beings. We feel emotions, something which some believe to be an important step in our evolution as we managed to develop the ability to communicate about or with our emotions using our language, facial or physiological expressions. Unfortunately, not all of us have been given the same ability to express our emotions. Some of us do it well and some of us always find it difficult to talk about our feelings and emotions. There is this thing called ‘emotional intelligence’ which has been around for about 20 years now and it talks about how talking or communicating our emotions can be scaled and how we can use this scale to help people who have trouble expressing themselves and make it more comfortable for them to talk about their daily emotions.
Emotion as a term is difficult to define, different people feel an emotion in different ways, what is hate for one person may just be mild dislike for another and something which is scary for one person may just be another day in normal life for another. So whichever emotion it is, it is always difficult to define it in a small space or in definite terms. It is because of this lack of certainty of emotions, even today, that makes it so difficult for any person to talk about their emotions. There is the fear of getting judged, being shunned by others, being an outcast or at times just the fear of what kind of possible response something that is emotional to you would attract from others. So this is a predicament that some people who find it tough to talk about their emotions face. I want to talk about the negative effects of not talking about your emotions whether they are positive or negative, with someone else. A lot of the time we talk about our emotions to someone, we get a rational response from them.
“I feel a bit sad”, the response we get is, “What happened?” “Is something wrong?” and sometimes, or actually most times, the “don’t be sad, just be happy and positive.”. These responses are not necessarily bad or totally unhelpful, but the thing about emotions is that it is always hard to rationalize what you feel, it is hard to put a scale on these things and explain to another person what it is you feel. Sometimes we feel bad for no reason, and sometimes we feel happy for no reason. It is always hard to explain feeling something for no reason but what I want to say is that is okay. It is totally normal to be happy or sad at times and it is admittedly difficult to talk about it at times but what I can guarantee anyone reading this, thinking that they can bottle up all of their emotions , is that it won’t really help for long. You will try and ignore your negative emotions and try and dtay positive but the truth is that at some point of time, they will take their toll on you. It is imperative that at that time you have someone to help you understand yourself and help you deal with these emotions. Always remember that its better late than never. So whenever you feel something, whether it is positive or negative, go on and talk about it to someone. It maybe a friend you trust, or a total stranger who you will never talk to again so there is no fear of judgment.
If you know someone who has difficult time expressing themselves, just give them some space, but also make it a point to make sure that they know that you are available to talk to. If at some point they do share something, don’t tell them that they don’t make much sense and should not be feeling this way. It is okay to feel something which is not necessarily justified. Emotions, a lot of times, lead to people being shunned out by society in general but it is up to you as an individual to make sure that no one you know feels that way.
*OFF TOPIC STUFF*
So the idea of today’s blog was given to me by a high school junior, Alice Sharma, who actually also suggested me to start writing a blog. So I guess the credits for this blog and the whole knightofsteel.com go to her. Thank you Alice!