It has been more than a month now since I joined my new college. I wanted to give a small update on how my condition has been in the past month. I have met a lot of new people. It has been a better start than any I have had in the last 2 years. It is more relaxed here and friendlier. It is more like the colleges you see in movies. It’s all just so liberating. I actually once walked around in a cape and no one even gave me a weird second look. It is something which is a big change for me from my last 2 colleges. I have made some friends. I wish to make more. Now that I don’t have a burden of studies on my shoulders, I may actually focus more on my blog and take it to the next level. My medicines have been decreased in strength but they continue as of now and I think I may need them for a while before I can be completely off them. I slept nearly 2 months straight without any sleeping pills so that is another small feather in the cap for me. I wouldn’t exactly say I am fine now, but I am in a much better situation than I was about 200 days ago.
In January, I didn’t really think I would find myself in the situation I am in now, a situation where I am actually stable and not hurting myself every other day. I think I have made a lot of progress and although it may understandably be something insignificant or irrelevant to most people. I would say I am sort of, kind of, little bit proud of it. This blog and sharing my problem publically has definitely helped me and I would like to give my sincerest thanks to all of you who messaged me for that. I have two pugs and new people in my life and this change has really been good for my mental health.
So just to end, you have really been helpful to me. Yes, you, the person reading this, whoever it is and I would like to sincerely thank you for that. You have now put me in a position where I can control my thoughts and at least look forward to a life and not death. I always equate my struggles with being in darkness but you have been the ray of sunshine in there. Nearly a hundred of you helped me, contacted me and talked to me so 100 rays of sunshine was always going to help. I don’t know how much it would mean to you but this was something really big for me.